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"Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight."
-Georg Christoph Lictenberg
If you are in an unhealthy, unhappy relationships trying to decide whether to stay or go the mere fact that you are asking this question is not a good sign. You have an entire life ahead of you make so make sure you are going to spend it with someone that deserves you!
There is never an easy way to end a marriage. But, if you are in an unhappy, unhealthy relationship and you stay, what's easy about staying in a marriage that is making your life miserable? What is the price you pay for never having your needs met and living with less than you deserve?
The first step in getting out of a bad marriage is to decide. Decide what you want in life. Decide how you want to live the rest of your life. Decide if you are a better person for being married to this person or if this marriage only causes you heartache and pain. Decide if you are settling for less than you deserve and if you want to live just like you are right now, without anything changing. Is this really what you want?
There is an old song by Paul Simon, 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover. The reality is once you make the decision to exit a bad marriage, it won't matter how you choose to leave because the mere fact that you've finally decided will allow you to move forward without going back.
Second you want to have an exit plan. Get all of your ducks in a row. Know what your financial situation is and what your options are. Know where you will live and what your options are and know when and how you are going to leave. Have close friends and family ready and willing to help you with this move. Don't just spring it on your partner without a strategy for leaving.
Again, once you decide, there won't be anything that your partner can say to change your mind. After all of your attempts to make things work, after all of the crying, screaming, pleading, therapy and all of your heartfelt efforts to keep your marriage together, you can walk away holding your head high knowing that you did everything you could do before walking away.
And the last step in getting out of a bad marriage is to believe in a better future. Know that where you are going has to be better than living a lifetime without the respect and love that you deserve. Know that as hard as it is to walk away, it would be much harder to live your whole life without any hope of true happiness. And know that ultimately it's your decision as to how you live your life, so choose wisely!
